Round Two

Round two of chemo was a bit different. 1st I wasn’t terrified for my life. My blood pressure was a nice 112/68 instead of 138/92 (something like that), the nurse said oh, you are much more relaxed this time and I said you think!
2nd knowing a little bit about the three weeks in between helped so it wasn’t so scary to wonder exactly what would happen and when it would happen. 3rd I feel like this will work and that I can do it. 4th It wasn’t so near to Jessica and Jonathan leaving so I have had more time to adjust to missing them.
The end of the first week last time I was wondering if I would feel yucky the whole six months of treatment and wondering if it was worth it. But a few days after that depressing thought I started feeling more like myself, food started tasting close to the same as it did before and water tasted okay. My energy and concentration came back so I had a good six - seven days of getting stuff done and feeling like I could even cook a meal (although Jamie didn’t let me).
The depression wasn’t so bad this time, but the nausea was a little bit sharper because I was trying not to take so much of the nausea medicine to see if this helped me find my happy place easier. I think that it did help me with the happy place thing but I didn’t make it to church because I was too nauseated to go. So, I guess we will have to play around with it next time to see if I can make it work so I can make it to church and still be happy.
We have had some super fun events this weekend a grand nephew getting married and a grandson getting baptized.
Life is truly a gift.
I loved my hat and scarf party. Jamie hosted and planned the event with help from Jacki and Amber. My hats are fabulous and the scarf’s I received are extraordinary. I received flowers, kites, candies, plants, a beautiful centerpiece, lovely notes, thoughts and the added joy of seeing sweet family and friends. I am so blessed to have so many wonderful and amazing people in my life. Everyone I know is living through their own drama’s and trials but still have taken time to reach out to me and make my trial into an adventurous journey instead of a trek through an alligator swamp.
All of my kids have been extra tender and caring. Extra notes, hugs, sacrifices of time and resources. Jamie has shouldered a lot of this because she is right here and is so protective of me and makes sure I don’t do anything I don’t need to, it really is a turn around to let your child/children take care of you without being able to do the same for them. A very amazing process to see them step up and take over the reins as you have taught them all your life to do and to have them do it so gracefully. Whenever these moments happen I realize that Heavenly Father is truly in our lives, defining our experiences helping us to have the chance to strengthen our character, to have the opportunity to prove to him that we are his children and that we want to follow our Savior and become his children forever.
I constantly pray for all those who need extra tender care, and all those who have lost so much as dear friends have lost loving spouses and other dear friends that constantly fight their own demons without ever a respite. My challenge seems puny compared to these. Again I am amazed at dear, dear, family and friends who have given me so much. I love you, I love that through this experience I get to see the amazing heroes for righteousness I have guarding and guiding me each day as you pray for me and as you have offered me countless thoughts of love and support. You are such strength to me and I pray I can be an instrument for good in the Lords hands and do as much good for others as you have done for me.