The good news is I am living and breathing. Yippee! We are on to the 3rd day. I don't feel like myself and I am having a hard time wrapping myself around what I need to do to be okay. Yesterday was a pretty good day, almost normal Jack and I went to the temple and to a movie and dinner. I can't seem to find my happy place (like what they say on the splash mountain ride in Disney land) and I just don't feel like myself. Jack played trains with me earlier today and Jamie and Kirk and kids played trains with me this evening and that seems to help, to have my loved ones around me. I know I will get through this. I just need to come to terms with it and realize it is only for a short time. Reminds me of Prophet Joseph in the liberty jail and all the other times when he felt despair and the words of comfort from our loving Father in Heaven that it will just be as a moment.
There is no getting around it, cancer really, really sucks. My tongue is a little numb and water tastes horrible. The doctor recommended crystal light and that helps a ton. It is hard to describe what you feel like, it is just so weird. I have little jabs of pain every now and then, a little bit of nausea. I think the emotional upheaval is the hardest, and still not knowing exactly what to expect. So anyway, this is a short update. I love you all so much. Thanks for your love, support and prayers. I know my redeemer lives, I don’t know how any of us could get through any of life’s trails without this knowledge. I am so blessed to have this knowledge and to know I am a daughter of a loving Father in Heaven who knows me and that my life is in his hands. May I make the most of this time, by growing closer to my wonderful family and friends and especially to my Savior.
I love you!
Monday, January 12, 2009
3rd day after chemo
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ReplyDeleteYou are SO brave. Thank you for sharing your (unwanted)journey with us. You are continually in my prayers and I put your name in the temple each week that I volunteer... Hailey misses you teaching Sunday School. She says you're so nice and kind and always smiling--those are about the exact words I'd use to describe you too!
ReplyDeleteYou are amazing!
ReplyDeleteMargo- Thank you for being so inspiring to me and everyone. Things seem to happen when we least expect them, but the knowledge we gain and things we learn is remarkable. I told Mindi that to this day I have yet to meet anyone who smiles as often and is so upbeat and cheery! You go girl!
ReplyDeleteLove, Lyndsay (McCullough) Gardner
I was just on Mindi's blog and I read the post about Uncle Jacks wristband that states Cancer Sucks! I totally second that. Typing this comment right now I am in tears after hearing that Scott's little sister who has been fighting Ewing's Sarcoma for two years has been diagnosed with a brain tumor today. Scott and I have seen our fair share of cancer in the last five years and we second that Cancer Sucks! You have such an amazing attitude all the time; that will carry you through. I am not sure if the Orthodontists community is like the dentist community. Scotts cousin was diagnosed with stage 5 millanomia and the dentists in Ogden have been so amazing. They have watched over him while he watches over his sweet wife and their three young little girls. They will go in for Ward and take over his patients at no charge, that is amazing. It is through these tender mercies that the Love of the Savior is seen. You will see so many tender mercies through this experience. We love you and keep you in our prayers.
ReplyDeleteMargo you are amazing. What a good attitude you are trying to have. I have a close friend who went thru 1 year of chemo and then radiation for breast cancer. She felt like you and stayed so strong even though many days were difficult. She is now working full time and has for a little more than a year. Doing great and I truely believe it was her being positive just like you. She ate even though food didn't taste the same but it helped her to heal and keep her strength up. I love you so much and I feel uplifted each time I read you blog. I can say without a shadow of doubt that with your attitude and sweet spirit you will be bless thru all of this. What a wonderful testimony you have. Heavenly Father loves us so much. I'm glad we are cousins.
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